If for too long you feel that you are in a kind of loop of alone and that you can not find a good relationship with a suitable partner, first of all, you are not alone.
You can find quite a few free or paid dating sites and a variety of applications for dating, with the leading ones being Tinder and OkCupid, with Millions of users in all over the world, only looking for all kind of relationships and maybe even love, and sometimes short love for a night or two.
Just before you give up, we’ve put together 14 mistakes that singles do during the dating period:
Convince yourself that your partner wants a serious and committed relationship with you
Especially if your meetings include late-night calls and late-night meetings because the other side was too “busy” at normal times every day.
Even if you have excellent sex together, as long as it starts and ends with sexual encounters in bed, the chances of it developing into a serious relationship are getting smaller.
Suggest that you will go out together or sit down to eat or have fun together and you can understand the reaction how serious that person is to you.
The same goes for those who disappear for a few days because they are “very, very busy” and then call when they want to come visit at night because they “missed you” and go visit this in your bed .. if it suits you, then it is fun.
Also, if the partner told you at the beginning of the conversation when you asked what he was looking for – and the answer you received was something light, not something compelling, fun, or anything that does not say unequivocally – he is not looking for a relationship.
Get out with people you do not really feel physically attracted towards or click.
Even if the person in front of you is charming, energetic, intelligent and looks good – if you do not really feel a click at the physical level at the beginning of the relationship, he probably will not come later.
If you have decided to meet someone and at the beginning of the meeting you see that you have no attraction to the other side, it is best to say gently that you are sorry, but do not feel that you have chemistry as you would like and prefer to be friends.
Between us, it’s a pity to waste an evening on a person you know you will not have a continuation, so why burn the two of your evening and let the other side end up?
Drink too much alcohol on dates
It’s okay to drink half a glass of wine if you’re one of those who can drink, but nothing more.
True, alcohol helps relieve tension and anxiety, but sometimes it can cause women to get too loose, and end up in bed unless that’s what suits you, but if you’re too fluid, the other side is less likely to take you.
The same goes for men, if you know that you are reacting unpleasantly to alcohol, do not drink too much, try to remain gentlemen and respect the girl you are with.
Talk with few people at the same time while searching the dating sites
If you started talking to someone and switched to the phone and the conversation flowed and flowed and you set a date, then skip the rest of your interactions with others until the end of the date, in which you decide whether to continue with the person or not.
The moment we get on a date when we know we have 3-4 more options on Stand By, we may broadcast a lack of interest in the date and something in our approach will convey a lack of seriousness that can pass unconsciously to the other side, feel this vibe and take you less seriously and destroy any chance of development connection.
Do not go dating matchmaking with people you know it will not happen between the two of you
After a time when you are single, every second person you meet may offer you to know the son of a friend of his / her nephew/daughter of his boss and more.
Even if you have been promised that he/she has a good soul with a wide heart and looks good, ask first of all to see a picture in order to decide if the other person is to your liking.
Do not feel uncomfortable, and if you feel there is no click on the picture, politely refuse.
Finding a partner is a job or adventure – depends on you
If you decide that you are ready for a relationship, consider that you may need to go out for quite a few dates and even dozens of dates until the right person arrives.
Do not treat dating as work, try to make it interesting, light, unconventional, and try to prepare a list of topics or questions to talk about so that the date will be fluent and will not feel like a boring job interview.
Do not let the one you got excited about and evaporate or the hallucinatory parade you’ve met, to lower your desire to go out for more dates.
As we wrote in the previous section, finding a relationship sometimes takes time and needs to be patient with the process and treat it like an adventure until finding the right partner.
Many of us give up after some unsuccessful dates or after a repeat number of refusals, and we should not fall into this place.
Try to check with yourself what might have prevented the date from being successful. Is this the other side you did not like or you did not like?
Do not play it too hard to get
When we were young, we were taught not to show too much enthusiasm so they would not think we wanted too much.
Some of us have taken it too far and behave indifferently during dating to the other side, even if they are very interested.
Try to examine the body language of the other side, whether it is smiling, whether their body is facing you, whether the pupils are dilated, or whether you are leaning toward them, they respond comfortably or recoil.
If you feel like it, you can say at the end of the date that you were happy and would be happy to meet again.
If you are serious, do not rush to bed at the end of the evening
Even if you had an amazing date and excellent chemistry, do not rush to sex at the end of the evening. Even if you feel terrible, if you are serious about the person, you should leave something for the next time and leave a good taste in your mouth.
It’s true that serious relationships can start from sex for the first time, but after you get a little deeper, the sex will be better and you’ll know where you are, especially if the person in front of you was planning a nightstand or something beyond that. Because if he planned on something one-time, he would also disappear after the first date.
Release your sex buddies/friends with benefits free
If you are intending to have a serious relationship, give up sex with your regular partner during the search, as well as the nighttime cuddle.
It can unconsciously convey that you are not really enthusiastic and that you have more options and the more you are “full” and sexually relaxed, the less you will transmit passion and desire to the other side.
After all, try to make it, you will not want to go out with someone who gets up in the morning in the arms of his friend or friend and meets you in the evening, right?
Because there is something in common sleep and intimate sex, which mixes a bit of emotion sometimes, and if you are really where you are willing to give up all the casual sex, you will begin to show willingness in the acts.
Do not let your ex stay around
Especially if you still have feelings for them, it will be very hard for you to break free of it and be emotionally open to bringing someone else into your heart.
Even if you have an amazing intimacy and a great connection, if every time you are alone or horny will run into your arms, they will fill you with a temporary emotional need that will later reduce your need to find a new relationship and only keep you away from the goal of a serious relationship.
Do not enter into a relationship with people who believe in the idea of an open, non-limiting relationship
or people who can not express commitment.
Of course, this conversation is supposed to come after a few meetings, but if you meet a partner who likes to celebrate and in a couple exchanges and directs you there to join – run away quickly because such a person is not looking for a monogamous relationship and will always need more excitement.
low self-esteem
If you’re going on a date that you’re not feeling pretty enough / cute/ funny/sexy – do not go for a date at all.
What you feel about yourself is what will radiate out to the other side and as long as you do not really feel that you love yourself, you will not like you back as you would like to feel loved.
If you have a hard day or feel that you are not in a fun and happy mood, do not go out on a date, it can only ruin the chance of getting to know someone who might be your next partner.
Do yourself an awareness work to strengthen self-confidence, or through a therapist who specializes in raising personal awareness, and you can see a difference in how others perceive you.
Ask a friend or girlfriend of the opposite sex to go through your profile on dating sites
Someone who is honest and objective enough to tell you if the pictures you put reflect the reality, what impression a person is making on your card.
Be honest about your card on dating sites, put a clear and up-to-date picture and be honest about your age, occupation, and marital status.
It’s the most unfortunate thing to get on a date and find out that the person in front of you would look like a picture that was added 5 or 10 years ago with 10 pounds or more.
Make a decision that you are ready to leave the world of single people.
Do it on the physical level – do therapy, go to a relationship workshop, it will create some kind of commitment to the level of mind and attitude toward the universe that you are willing to change in your life.
In conclusion, in order to find a good partner, it is sometimes necessary to change thinking habits.
Especially after a few years of bachelorhood, when you’ve forgotten how it is to live together, or you’ve never experienced it.
The mistake of many single people is that they roll from day to day and from one short relationship to another, and do not stop for a moment to check what patterns are guiding them and what their approach leaves them stuck.
Whether it is difficult to overcome a love that has ended, a very deep affront to a past relationship, a lack of trust in people or beliefs at deeper levels that prevent us from being happy and in a loving and loving relationship.